Please, no more pictures.

I just want to make art and be creative, can't I just be left alone. I never asked to be a celebrity.

Just playin'. I really just wanted an excuse to show off my new scarf. Awesome, right?

It's driving me crazy . . .

If you don't think this is funny then I hate you. If there's a bad pie-chart joke I haven't heard it.

Gisele, my love

Gisele is playing chess while everyone else is playing checkers. She's the Secretariat of people. Or maybe Secretariat was the Gisele of race horses. And if you're offended that I'm comparing Gisele to Secretariat then you don't know how much I love Secretariat. Or Gisele.

Work it, Girlfriend.

On why Phoenix in March is awesome.

This was Sunday afternoon:


That's the Dodgers versus the Padres in beautiful Glendale Arizona. If this picture was better you'd be able to see that the hitter is Manny Ramirez. It was 85 degrees with a cool breeze. The beer was extra cold and a pleasingly large number of beautiful latina Dodger fans did not burden themselves with any excess clothing. Heaven, in other words.

This was 6:00 a.m. Monday morning:



Talk about back to real life, man. I like the snow and all but enough already, God. We get it, you can bring snow in spring time. Noted!

Crazy cat lady

That cat has the confident look of a trained killer. I'm scared of that cat. And a little turned on. Did I say that out loud?

Go Aggies

Aggie cheerleaders representin'. . .

Oh, like you've never done this before.

You can pretend like bullets aren't the perfect size to serve as toe separators but you're not fooling anyone. I mean, duh. Am I right, ladies?

In related news, isn't my spider tatt bitchin' and/or awesome? You can be honest. Is it the coolest thing you've ever seen or just mind-blowingly tits?

Gimme your money or the dolly gets it.

I was only kidding around though. The dolly is fine. But in reality that 9mm woulda blown a hole right on through without even really stopping.

Check out my brand new kitty cat.

Her name is Trouble because that's what she is. Her mother was killed in a shirt factory fire and she's been on her own ever since. The picture makes her eyes look bluer than they really are. My eyes are actually that green though, clownishly green you might say.

The other picture is what happened to former kitty. I loved her too much and she showed me her tail-lights. Love is a cruel mistress, no?